PAIN & QUESTIONS

My friend looks at me and asks: “Voni, what are you going to do? When I read Facebook you seem to be unsure of yourself…if you are going to Brazil or when. What are your plans???”

A good question. Some of the answer are here…so stick with me.

Roller coasters are an adventure. It takes courage to climb into the cart, tighten the buckle on your body, then be pulled to the top and pause, before gravity takes hold and the group of carts fastened together begin their wild descent.

I’ve not been to a carnival recently, but I have been on a roller coaster of emotions and questions for one year and five months, to the day. Until now, it hasn’t yet slowed down enough for me to jump out.

While on this roller-coaster, I moved everything out of our apartment, bringing a few things to my bedroom at Sheryl’s house in Portland. Six months later I took some of my things to my bedroom in Georgia, in Lanae’s house. Almost three months ago I came back to my bedroom at Sheryl’s. Now I need to go to my bedroom in my apartment in Natal, Brazil.
Too many suitcases. Too many miles.

Do you remember the adage about when one’s spouse dies, “Do not make any serious changes for one year.”
I am here to say, “that is good advice!” and “do not do what I have done.”

So, why did I do it like this? I’m not going to bore you with all my reasons. Suffice it to say, I now believe I needed to be quieter and wait upon the Lord more

Nothing bad happened. However, I was more stressed than I needed to be,

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall [b]direct your paths.”
Proverbs 3: 5-6. New King James Bible

So, now what? It is time to stop this roller-coaster and get off. Check out where I’ve been and where I’m going.

God is placing some challenges in my life, that I want to share with you. This one is only the FIRST of them.

At the end of September, I will be teaching a group of 5000 women. THE CHALLENGE? I may be somewhere here in the states, and the women will be at a conference in Bahia, Brazil. Yes, it is feasible. I need God to provide the tech people to make it happen., and much wisdom for me. I’ve done a lot of visual taping for TV and teaching. But I’ve never taped 40 minutes. That is entirely different.
This is the first challenge.

I’ill share the second challenge on the list tomorrow.

I WILL NEED YOUR HELP IN PRAYER! YOUR PRAYERS MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
IS IT OK IF I ASK – ARE YOU WILLING TO BE AN ESSENTIAL PART OF ALL OF THIS WITH PRAYER?
I cannot do it alone.

Much love to each one.
voni

LITTLE THINGS

Tuesday July 31 Portland Oregon

I glanced at the clock. My friend will be arriving soon to pick me up. I slip on my shoes – and grimace a little, thinking “I’ve got to get these toe nails cut!” Then I grabbed my shoulder bag and cane, heading to answer the doorbell. “One of these days, I’ll be able to do it.” (
One of the disadvantages of having a body that dictates to me is it won’t let me curl and bend my body like I used to do to take care of my feet. Very frustrating, to say the least!) I walk with my cane to the car, follow my routine to get into the car, and we’re off to meet the third part of this trio .

Who says white-haired women can’t have the fun of eating lunch together, laughing, along with some serious conversation that stretches our minds. We three are sitting at lunch in the Cherrywood Dining Room… a lovely place to eat, the food is good, the prices reasonable – and the noise level isn’t so high that we can’t hear each other talk.. which isn’t true in many restaurants during lunch hour.

I hear my name called and glance up at that beautiful curving stairway with the iron railing. I see the manicurist from the Beauty Salon upstairs, running down the stairs and coming straight over to our table.
“Voni, I thought I saw you down here, and I had to come check. Someone just phoned me and canceled her 1:30 appointment. I remembered we weren’t able to work on your feet last week, and I wondered if you can come at 1:30?” She was smiling and excited.
I looked at my friend who would be taking me home. “What do you think?”
She laughed: “Yes, PLEASE do it. You and I both know what your feet look like!”
I grinned at her. Friends have the right to be honest.
I looked at the manicurist who was anxiously waiting. “I’ll do it” and we all smiled, We knew that this was a God-thing,

About an hour later, I’m sitting with my feet in a tub of hot water, my co-hort, Penny, is sitting watching, Lillian (#3 of our trio) had left, and we are having fun with “woman talk”. Christie is doing her magic of messaging my feet, then carefully working to clean and trim, and polish on those tired toe nails. I look at Penny and we smile. We are very aware that our Father, God, has taken these little needs and cared for them in such a fun way so we will have some laughs about it.

I want you to know that you and I serve a God Who is aware -of everything.
He loves you and I, and each person on this planet. My finite mind cannot grasp the total reality of His infinite love for each one of us. It doesn’t matter that none of us deserve that love. But somehow, for some reason, because He created us in our mothers’ wombs, we are His, and He loves us. He smiles with our laughter, weeps with our tears.

I do not know why He didn’t “wave a magic wand” and save my first marriage of 40 years. But, I do know that His presence was in our bedroom as my second husband passed from this life. I was blessed to hold Joe’s hand as we heard him take his last breath. The “why” of me here and Joe gone has no answer. But, I DO KNOW THIS! GOD KNOWS I AM HERE He reaches to me as He cares for the “little things” to remind me He is also here for the BIG THINGS.

He is also here for you! Can you think of some of the “little things” He has done that surprised and blessed you?
I would love for you to share them with me.
– Voni